MARRIAGE - ARTHUR CHIBUEZE EZECHUKWU

I haven’t published an article for a while mainly because I had more pressing needs to attend to. Infact those needs are still pressing as at now. However, I have decided to ink down this one issue that has been bothering my mental faculties for a very longtime now, and I would like to have your views on it when you must have read this piece.

Marriage, the one union that gives birth to other unions. Infact biblically, marriage is the only union officially ordained by God himself in person. And so, down through history and time, this union has continued to thrive and suffice it to say that it is the oldest union ever to exist and still in existence today.

Until now, marriage was the most sacred and devout oath a person could ever take in his/her life. It was taken seriously by both parents of the bride and the groom. Marriage during the ancient times was used to build, repair, and damage relationships between countries and rival families. It was also a ladder through which one can climb to fame in the society then. We all know the role marriage played in splitting the then catholic church into what we know now as the protestant church or more preferably, the Anglican Church. Such was the significance of marriage before now.

You would agree with me that nothing takes ones breath away like that moment when the boy/man pops out the engagement ring and a marriage proposal as well as when the girl/woman sheds tears of joy and says the ultimate "YES". Left for me alone, I would say that that moment is more breath taking than the marriage ceremony itself. It used to be every boys dream to become of age and marry the girl of his dreams and build his future with her. Then, they would build their lives and home together and around each other and their family. Back then, the accumulation of wealth wasn’t essentially a pre-requisite for getting married. One could get married be he magnanimously rich or not.

Today, the table has turned. Divorce is on the loose, nobody gives a damn any longer whether he/she is married to the daughter of the president of U.S.A or the son of the prime minister of England. Today, every girl believes that she must get married to that rich dude; therefore if he is not rich yet, she’s not getting married to him. I happened to speak to pretty lady who is also my course mate. Our discussion was more geared towards relationship issues, mainly a frivolity anyway. However, what threw me off balance was that way, into the discussion, she said to me:

"Arthur, your wife is probably still in Jss3"

I was surprised, but then I asked her

"Why would you say that?"

She said

"You are still in school, and you haven’t made money yet"

We went on and on. But the bottom line was that she told me I had to make enough money before I could get married and for me get wealthy it would take time and while its taking that much time my "wife" whom is presumably in jss3 is advancing through life and getting matured. Then by the time I am finally wealthy, she would be ready to pluck.

It struck me at that moment that such was the brainwash our society is in. Gone are the days when she marries for love or care or respect. Today, she marries for money and wealth and affluence. Infact, the higher institution is nothing more than a mere frivolity to her. Most of our girls and women believe that getting a higher education is just for the sake of having a degree after that, marriage follows. They believe that getting married to the older richer guy is the ultimate goal; getting married to someone within their age bracket is no longer a viable option, unless the money factor is there. They have lost sight of the true purpose of the union of marriage. Infact the saying, "besides every successful man there is woman" is no longer relevant to our society today. I dare to rephrase it by saying "besides every successful man there will be a woman"

This norm has rippled the balance of our society today and we have failed to see it, at least not yet. That is why I wouldn’t say more at this juncture. I would rather take a raincheck, and return later to dwell on the ripples caused by this present norm in our society today. STAY ALERT!